Hmmmmmmmm ok!

So this blogging lark takes up some time. Don’t get me wrong it’s time I want to spend, but at the moment I’m just reading. Reading everyone else’s bloggs on word press, which is “brilliant” . . . . . . . but its not getting mine done. Like I said, I’m not a natural reader, but that doesn’t stop me wanting to be. The problem is not rocket science, I live with a beautiful baby girl, my daughter Poppy who’s nearly two. I live in a spacious enough house but its not got a study or a space for study so space is overtaken by, well Poppy!! My time outside work is taken up with, yup you got it, Poppy!

I’m hoping I’m not alone when I say “Its impossible to write with kids about” Seriously time consuming and seriously annoying!! I’m not afraid to say that!

What else do I do at the min that’s time consuming, well I run my own small business as an Odd job man mainly to supplement me being a full time dad and also to keep my head active. Money is short since I left the prison service so anything I can do to help out whilst looking after Poppy is a big help. In fact I need more of it, but don’t we all. I’m doing OK to be honest, getting more work than I could handle at one point but its all a learning curve and as I’m just starting out I’m learning some early lessons. On top of my handy man business which trades under the name of Di4Y Solutions by the way, find us on facebook!! I’m also working as a removal man. I started doing removals when I worked in the prison service as a good friend started his own removal business and I loved it. So when I saw an advert on facebook looking for a self employed removal porter I knew I wanted it. Removals come in anywhere from nine in one week to none, so I’m never sure from week to week where I’ll be but that also helps my particular lifestyle and child care issues. So in-between all of this I have tools to sort out, bins to put out blah blah blaaahhh!! Oh and my hobbies, of which I now have very few due to my current health situation. I miss them all, MMA, Judo, Brazilian Jiu jitsu, rolling, weights, CV, unarmed combat, self defence. Teaching . . . . . . . grrrrrrrr I miss it all, I’m confident however, I will be back. My back injury is a constant, it moulds everything I do, controls my every waking min. I’m currently just this week off my Tramadol’s after spending months trying to get the little addictive bastards. Its been hell, and I’m still not sure I’m in the clear yet.

Xbox . . . . . . . . . . . . . hmmmmmmm yeah I know, a naughty one but never the less its a pastime I really enjoy. I’ve played shoot em ups for years even playing seriously at one point from my PC with my brothers from the US. Its a pastime I really don’t get to do these days as I consider time with my daughter as far more important.

 

The only real quality time I have is in the evenings and that is obviously taken up with my equally gorgeous girlfriend Lisa and food! So I need to get my head around the fact of steeling myself away somewhere at some point to get some head space in order to write. That’s up to me of course but I just need to get into that habit. You may have to bear with me as this second blog shows in nearly a month gap. In fact to my surprise today I was asked about my blog and where a new one was. I wasn’t really expecting that. In fact she said she thought she had missed it because it had been so long. Hmph not good enough Chaz! I may be a long way from being taken seriously in writing circles but I may have underestimated that my story may be of interest to some people and if your going to start something then bloody well start it and see it through. Especially if that something is something you want to do. So simply put I would love more time to myself for reading and music and writing and stuff, so its up to me to make it happen. I’ll keep my notebook handy and I’ll write in it whenever I can. When I got a bit down on paper that makes any sense I’ll get it blogged up, pronto. Too-gever we will see where this takes us.

So reading other blogs I find that some of the most interesting one’s are about something in general. A little story for example or an article. However speaking today to my unexpected reader its also apparent that someone will read my blog to find out about a person from a social point of view, a general human interest. So I’m just going to write about whatever takes my fancy and hopefully my memory will be good enough to remember some of the seriously funny moments in my life. These will of cousre be at the expense of some of my friends, especially in the service. I may have to do some research and get some of the lads together and have a night re living the good old days.

So to wrap it up, less facebook, less TV, more notebook, more research! . . . . . . . .  win the lottery.

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So Chaz decides to blog

If its good enough for stephen fry then its good enough for me, blogging, that is to log stuff on the web as I’ve just discovered! Web/log . . . . Blog. Didn’t know that but I thought before I started I should do some research as all good writers should! Let me explain tho, I’m not a writer. Never been that good at gramma c! In fact if it wasn’t for Facebook I really wouldn’t have a clue about most things relating to written word. Bit of a white Lie of course as I feel my mum cringing as she reads this.

I’ve always liked reading but never been that good at it! It takes a seriously good book to grab my attention long enough to read all the way through, however many have succeeded. I’m told I don’t need to be that good really. The modern iPhone has very good auto correct and access to web means I can research most other things. I’m a good solid learner with no ego or pre judgmental ideas about learning. Which means I soak up new data well. Retaining it is a whole other story for another day. Truth is I just lack a bit of something upstairs which has hindered me most my life but what I lacked in that I excelled in common sense. So I know a little about a bit and that mixed with a bit of common sense and a lot of life experience! I mean a lot, I’ve started a blog. Already without having a clue what I was going to talk about I’ve waffled on for a couple of paragraphs. So here’s to a new adventure in print and blogging and moving on from my micro blogging on Facebook and twitter! Lets get this blog on the road!

So why is it a new adventure then, some of you won’t know me of course. Some of you won’t realise the terrible / joyful / hard / easy / painful twists my life just took in the last few years. Those who are my social friends on Facebook know only to well my ups and downs as I’ve flooded their timelines with most of it since day one of joining up. But to you the new reader ill start by just giving an over view of what’s gone before.

I was a prison officer for ten years, then “they” started to mess things around and screw with honest hard working genuine people. I hated that, and so slowly but surely fought back “they” hated that even more. Stress, hatred, fear, all welled up boredom also sank in. I got injured in the line of duty, and a stupid training course I shouldn’t have been on. Then they picked on me, bullied me. I dragged it out and played their silly game until I couldn’t take any more, I then left the job (medically retired) I loved, and the people I loved and also hated some of them! I found out some people were stabbing me in the back and life hit rock bottom during all of this. I was paralysed with my injury. It was a long long long recovery, still going on to this day. My daughter who is two this year, my beautiful girlfriend and my two sons and of course my very closest friends and family saved my life. I had something to do with saving my life as well however. I allowed, as I do, everybody in. Not easy when your on the bottom and you were on the top. But life has taught me to be honest and it worked. Wow that really was the short version, but I’m sure ill go over stuff as this goes on. It’s a start.

So is any one going to read this or am I talking to myself, I don’t give what’s-it either way. Call it therapy for me. I got loads in my head that I’ve been through that prob could do with coming out. Death, Suicide, death more deaths, my suicidal thoughts, parents splitting up, selling drugs, takin drugs, arresting thousands of shoplifters, fighting most of them, friends, enemy’s, the doors, the fights, wrongful arrest, becoming an officer, the challenges, new friends, the fights, the deaths, the long training, the riots, the fights, the challenges, the deaths!! Loss!! Loosing faith gaining knowledge, gaining inspiration, awakening to what’s really going on in this world, finding a little man who lived 2500 years ago called Buddha, and having the strength to be different and not give a damn what people think. Wow that’s a lot! Still here? I know my mum is, that’s her job. So lets blog! Lets get some stuff out my head and let’s start this new life together, well its a few months old already but your here any way. It won’t all be about me, but it will be me talking and putting my spin on stuff and trying to make sense of it all, and if my phone crashes now none of this will ever see the light of day!! You better hold on d . . . .